am i independent?

what do you do when you meet a problem? share it with your friends and family because they may offer good solutions. or you will just try your best and struggle to solve it yourself? the last option will be to not bother about the existence of the problem.

problems usually arise when we get out of our comfort zones. when we feel uncomfortable in a situation, we just want to get out of it immediately. given no choice but to stay on, problems start to form. you hate what you are doing now, leave anything that is related to it till the last minute and throw your temper when the outcome is not what you expect. you get pissed off and start questioning your decision to stay on. your foul temper will affect the moods' of those around you. others' opinion on you changes. in the worst situation, relationships will be tested.

face with a problem, i will try to solve it myself. even if it is not within my limits, i will continue to try until i am frustrated with myself. i dont like to seek help from others unnecessarily. i want to try solving it myself because sometimes, i feel that i am in the survivor game. i only have myself to depend on for my survival. only myself is responsible for my own future. if i am unable to do something by myself, how can i expect myself to strive on my own in the future?

that sounds like a politically correct answer but i am starting to question myself. is it really what i am thinking or is it because i do not want to show others the weak side of myself. someone told me this before "dont cry before your members." when i was preparing for the annual guides campfire in secondary4. i was in charge of the campfire and i could feel the pressure building up as the day was closer. for the past years in guides, campfire had been a combined affair with the scouts but we decided to split at my year. i had no prior experience and i had to admit, i had very high expectations on myself. so throughout the whole period, i reminded myself constantly that i could not admit defeat because if i did, what was going to happen to the campfire? i had to fulfil my duties as their leader and hang on. refusing to ask for help could be because i do not want to appear weak in front of others.

not recognising the problem is definitely not something i will do. why run away from it? by doing so, it does not help to solve the problem. all i can get is just temporary peace and pleasure. by the time i have decided to face it bravely, the problem may have gotten worse. i hate to drag things. i want to get things done fast and simple.

am i being stubborn when i refuse to seek help from others?